I want Minions! No I really do. However, I don’t want to be evil to acquire them… but… I would so utilize a staff of hundreds, the massive amount of good I could accomplish. I can tell you right now potholes in the road would cease to exist, along with litter and everyone’s yard would look fabulous… just a few ideas. I joke all the time that I want a clone. I really need a clone. While I’m being stupidity unrealistic, why not 3 clones? We clone cats and sheep they do nothing. Why not me? I pay taxes. I contribute to society. I can be as useful as a cat or sheep. My posse of Laura’s and I would work! Why stop at 3? Why not a dozen or 100 clones? Now that’s just being crazy and irresponsible. How could possibly keep track of that many copies of myself or feed them? Have you ever seen a family with more that 3 kids? It’s a complete chaotic nightmare. I’m trying to ease my workload, not create more.
It’s not that I’m all that important– I’m just busy. Now I realize busy is my own doing. But this solo Laura works a day job and does comedy at night, tries to write and still have a social life. And I would do more if I just had more time and money etc.…I’m a super hero without any super powers, except my fabulous shoes. I have a crazy amount of ideas– I think are good. And the unrealistic sense that I should try to accomplish all of them. But it would be really helpful if I could have my clones working so this Laura could take a nap!
But wonder if the stand-up clone gets really famous and tries to take the credit? I think Gallagher tried this scenario back a few years ago and it blew up in his face. Lousy clones…trying to take credit for borrowed success. Wonder if my clone gets cynical and jaded? Being on the road all the time while I’m hanging at home? And she starts bad-mouthing about me all around town. How to I punish essentially myself? There’s so much clone etiquette to learn. Wonder if she starts hanging out with other clones? And they want to start a clone union? Maybe I’ll kill her off and start fresh. Or is that rude? Is it suicide or murder to kill your clone? Kill your clone! That’s a great horror movie idea! But clone would have to be spelled with a K because that makes it scarier. Clearly I have thought about this way too much. It would probably get weird. It’s one of those things that seem good in theory. Like whip cream in bed and polygamy to men…
Anyhow Sandra Bullock rocked these Rupert Sanderson pumps at the premiere of Minions, which opens this week. Since this is the closest I’ll ever get to having a minion—I would love a pair. Thank you Nancy for the suggestion.
Back to work for me- minus my minions and clones.
Happy Sunday
Laura